[Verse 1]
Rocked up late
Sticky floor
Cheap beer
Line out front
But the boys got me in from the rear (cheers mate)
Neckin’ pints
Sweat runnin’ into my eyes
DJ smirks
Like he’s readin’ my bad decisions tonight

[Chorus]
I got kicked out
On “Come On Eileen”
Shirt half-tucked
Feelin’ way too keen
Spinnin’ round strangers
Like they’re family
Security’s yellin’
But the chorus had a hold of me
I got kicked out
On “Come On Eileen”

[Verse 2]
Hands went up
Soon as that fiddle came in
Whole room jumped
Every bastard tryin’ to sing
I’m on a chair
Arm round some random sheila’s neck
Beltin’ the words
That I never quite seem to get

[Chorus]
I got kicked out
On “Come On Eileen”
Pub choir mess
Sloppy
Loud
Off-key
Spilled my drink
On the bloke in green
Next thing I know
I’m sailin’ for the door in a scene
I got kicked out
On “Come On Eileen”

[Bridge]
Out on the curb
Breath like a brewery
Shoes all red
Hear that hook
Leakin’ out the walls above my head
Laughin’ hard
Call the lads
“You won’t believe this
Hey”
Worth the ban
For the best three minutes of my day

[Chorus]
I got kicked out
On “Come On Eileen”
Best night ruined
By the best damn theme
If lovin’ that track
Is a crime for me
Then cuff these wrists
’Cause I’ll do it all again next week
I got kicked out
On “Come On Eileen”